Happy August! I’ve been waitressing in a resort town all summer, and, boy, do I need to rant.

I am SICK and TIRED of both servers and customers pityingly defaulting to, “oh, the restaurant is just so short-staffed at the moment.”

Ok, yeah, it was a tough summer for the kitchen and we had some messy scheduling days (issues that every business experiences at times), but overall, we’re not short-staffed. This is a default response for impatient and indulgent customers. And it needs to be nixed.

Yes, I’ve been to plenty of restaurants where the waiter sucked. They didn’t smile, didn’t have any pep in their step, and didn’t care when things were screwed up. I think this is a rare case, though. For the most part, restaurant workers are busting their butts to serve customers well and make the experience enjoyable.

I also understand that it is practically impossible to go out to eat in Crested Butte. Almost half of our restaurants are not open and operating, and the half that are operating are closed multiple days per week or have limited hours. This is a long-term negative impact related to COVID that affects locals and visitors alike. The other long-term impact of COVID that we experience: an insane amount of visitors. A number of visitors that our restaurants (or our trailheads, grocery stores, campsites, and roads) can barely handle. The more visitors we have, the more likely it is that guests are extremely hungry and annoyed before even sliding into a booth to eat. I get that there are more issues going on than rude customers, but servers and bartenders are humans that are trying their best and deserve respect.

Even if our restaurant was staffed to the maximum, it is simply unlikely that each table will get their food in under 30 minutes during the lunch and dinner rush. No matter how many employees, it is difficult to serve 70-80 people quality food and drink in an expedited time at a sit-down restaurant where the wait to sit down can be up to 2 hours long. Especially when most customers want “light ice” or “dressing on the side” or “extra crispy fries”. The more someone modifies, the more they wait, and the more everybody else waits. Even if our restaurant was staffed to the maximum, every single staff member would be running around to satisfy customer wants. Even if our restaurant was staffed to the maximum, it could seem like we are short-staffed. Yes, customers deserve good service and they chose this restaurant for a reason, but there is a line that is easily crossed when it comes to expectations versus reality. This rant relates to mid-tier restaurants, not fine dining or fast food— the type of restaurants where you expect good service and good food, but not a Michelin-type experience.

I wish that guests would think twice before asking, “Oh, are you short-staffed?” I wish customers thought more along these lines: “Oh, my server is serving 3 tables (usually we are serving more tables because more tables = more money), and they are trying to meet the needs of each person at each of these tables at the same time. Maybe I could be a little more patient. Maybe they did forget my lemon wedge, or maybe they are printing a check, bringing a side of mayo, running another beer, and then typing in a quick order. We did have to wait 30 minutes for our table. It will probably take a while for our food to come out because there are so many hungry people here. Maybe I am being a little demanding and have unrealistic expectations for the service I will receive at 6pm on a Friday night in a resort town in the middle of July. Maybe this is what it’s like to go out to eat (whether it’s busy or not), regardless of how many people are working here, or regardless of how hard my server is working. Maybe I don’t pity my server, I am just a little disillusioned about the lack of control I have when I go out to eat and what my expectations should be.”

When you go out to eat, you are taking a gamble. You have no control over how long the food takes or how it tastes. And, most of the time, neither does your server. The service might not be perfect and you might be at the restaurant for longer than expected. It might not be because the establishment is short-staffed.

Even if our restaurant was staffed to the maximum, it could seem like we are short-staffed because of unrealistic expectations and entitled guests. Try not to be one of them.

5 Steps to Being a Quality Customer at a Restaurant

1. Check yourself when you sit down. Don’t take it out on your server that you came in starving, the trip is more expensive than planned, your kids are brats, or your partner is passive-aggressive. Take a breath and enjoy that someone else is making food for you and delivering it. Being kind does not cost anything.

2. Understand that your server/bartender is a human that is handling the wants of dozens of other humans. How can you make your wants easy to fulfill (everyone ordering drinks at the same time, minimal substitutions, etc.)? Should I feel bad for my server who is busting their butt or should I feel bad for myself because I’m a needy adult (lol)?

3. Acknowledge that you are a cog in a very large wheel. How long was the wait to be sat? How full is the restaurant? How busy is the town? Is it peak lunchtime or dinnertime? These factors impact your service. Check your expectations.

4. Acknowledge that the server is a cog in a very large wheel. The server does not have much control over how long it takes to get a table, make a drink, or cook a meal. They likely care about delivering good service despite their lack of control. Again, being kind does not cost anything.

5. If you can afford to go out to eat, you can afford to tip your server well, especially if they did everything they could to make your experience pleasant. Anything less than an 18% tip will be taken personally. And it’s likely your server will wake up in the middle of the night 3 days later and think, “damnit, I forgot that guy’s extra mustard.” This time, being kind does cost something, but it goes a long, long way. Trust me.

No, Karen, it’s not that we are short-staffed. It’s just that there are literally not enough hands or smiles in the entire universe to meet your needs.